我 I 愛 LOVE 祢 YOU: December 2019

Sunday, December 29, 2019

搭訕

唔該，我唔覺意掹咗咋白頭髮出嚟呀，請問可以揼去邊呀?

My pick up line: I just pulled out whole bunch of my grey hairs, could you tell me where should I discard them please?

Saturday, December 28, 2019

愛吃

Pumpkin is Chickening in a Mush Room

愛裡沒有懼怕

樂對

Years ago I was serving in a church band

And recently I want to join another band

This time I'm going to name him husband

SIS

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ, please pray for my sister. The doctor said she needed an eye surgery. Please pray to God in Christ's Name for her healing and health. Thank you very much.

Friday, December 27, 2019

恩愛

等我上網睇吓我老公嘅近況先

Let me find out how is my husband doing recently on the internet

去斑

我唔想做斑點狗

又唔想做長頸鹿

都唔想做美洲豹
May I have smooth and clear skin please?

Thursday, December 26, 2019

Wednesday, December 25, 2019

尖端

佢哋蒙咗面個樣好型呀！

They look so attractive with their faces covered

Tuesday, December 24, 2019

掃興

我聽講耶穌唔喺十二月出世的

Somebody told me that Jesus was not born in December

灰宴

要一個煙灰叉雞飯

同埋煙灰撈粗唔該
Ash BBQ Pork Rice
Ash Lo Mein Please

Monday, December 23, 2019

Saturday, December 21, 2019

靠害

抑慢褲毫

Instead of removing the evil
they become helpers of the devil

自制

噚晚放屁嘅時候我諗起

在髮端飄過是你氣味

滲出興奮的眼淚

拋開傷感過去
重新親你
I Cannot Control My Love

Friday, December 20, 2019

Wednesday, December 18, 2019

兔兔

瞓覺都要Cute
I slept with My Melody last night and I am going to sleep with her until the next laundry day!

Monday, December 16, 2019

幫我

My ring finger is waiting patiently

But my ovaries are in such a hurry

And my career is still pretty messy

God please give me tons of money

To give the best to my future baby

To honor You with my own family

With successful career and destiny

In Jesus Christ our Lord Almighty

ZOO

I just realize I am living with different species of animals in a city everyday.
呢群可愛嘅小動物已經成為我生命嘅一部份

Saturday, December 14, 2019

Food

He provides food for those who fear him...(Psalm 111:5)

That is an important reason why I fear God...

Friday, December 13, 2019

懷孕

My belly fat is so thick that even ultra sound cannot detect the fetus

FIT

My waistline is 24 inches, says my neck.

I am tall and skinny, says my index finger.

Wednesday, December 11, 2019

明晒

黎明。。。Leon Lai。。。Neon Light 。。。榮光。。。光復。。。原來喺咁

周太

My fake ex husband likes to play with every tube-shaped object in my body

我假前夫姓周，周圍娟(可靠消息透露)

歷史

Barbarians should go to barber shops, use bar soap and stay behind bars

Monday, December 9, 2019

由煙

Do not worry about your wealth

Tar will take care of your health

不要為健康憂慮

癌病死都由得佢

焦油

Productive and die early

Improve national GDP

犧牲小我

完成大我

暗病

幸福小裡忍

Negative emotions can make her sick

Treat your wife better you stupid dxck

Saturday, December 7, 2019

Friday, December 6, 2019

高齡

明明就喺叮噹啦, 多咩啦A夢炙

Respect the passed-on-cartoonist, old lady

有本事你就講日文, Dollar Amone, you know

喺 Doraemon 呀阿嬋,ドラえもん呀, 成日掛住錢

。。。-__- 。。。

到咗第二日又經過漫畫舖...

收聲

私隱評論員

商秘評論員

醫秘評論員

犯法你玩完

Shut Up Commentators of Privacy

收肉

肉肉無窮

辱辱無窮

Professional Insultants
Rob other's abundance

憂慮

死啦！我咁大食會唔會嫁唔出嫁？

All I Can Eating Disorder

No man will make an offer

Thursday, December 5, 2019

超屎

諗故仔作故仔 X街lielie故仔

單單都喺玩靠害鋪舖都喺咁陰毒

仲會令你死無全屍諗故仔作故仔

X街lielie故仔喺最毒嘅故仔

變種

Once you arrive Detroit

He will come to destroy

Your wife is never a toy

A pig usually gets 屠宰

Therefore be a good boy

Stick with her and enjoy

In Detroit the city of joy

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

耳環

Extract ear wax to make ear candle to extract ear wax

浪漫

The ear wax was so big I could make a candle out of it.
耳光

收福

落天使啦! 收嘢啦!

Suck your belly in, Los Angeles!

福利

Marriage Leave: once you get your marriage, leave

婚離? 啋過你!

變綠

I am unemployed and broke

I will soon become the Hulk

再發窮惡

Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Lame

The game is such a shame

Please eliminate the game

Monday, December 2, 2019

POP

I accidentally popped a pimple on my head. I am popular now.

抉擇

如果有人唔想我開心，我應該順佢意扮唔開心好抑或做自己好呢？

Other's Choice? God's Joy!

My neighbor does not want me to be happy. Whenever I laugh, she (the younger girl ) comes out, speaks gibberish in the hallway and tries to disturb others. Last time even another neighbor called her bxtch. I guess I am not too sensitive here.

刀傷

師徒拔刀

Stupid Road

鬼故

Someone tries to talk to me in the air with a blurry voice. I cannot hear clearly most of the time and I do not know who he is. And of course no one thinks that voice is trustworthy.