Luke 8
40 Now when Jesus returned, a crowd welcomed him, for they were all expecting him. 41 Then a man named Jairus, a synagogue leader, came and fell at Jesus’ feet, pleading with him to come to his house 42 because his only daughter, a girl of about twelve, was dying.
As Jesus was on his way, the crowds almost crushed him. 43 And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years,but no one could heal her. 44 She came up behind him and touched the edge of his cloak, and immediately her bleeding stopped.
45 “Who touched me?” Jesus asked.
I haven't......yet! I want to though!
When they all denied it, Peter said, “Master, the people are crowding and pressing against you.”
46 But Jesus said, “Someone touched me; I know that power has gone out from me.”
47 Then the woman, seeing that she could not go unnoticed, came trembling and fell at his feet. In the presence of all the people, she told why she had touched him and how she had been instantly healed. 48 Then he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace.”
I am going to touch Jesus's cloak to get rid of the psychotronic witchcraft weapons and my fat bellyness and my cellulites and the scars moles and spots from the weapons and my gray hair and grow lots of brand new black hairs....especially on top of my scalp and hopefully my eyesight will be restored to 20/20 vision.
49 While Jesus was still speaking, someone came from the house of Jairus, the synagogue leader. “Your daughter is dead,” he said. “Don’t bother the teacher anymore.”
50 Hearing this, Jesus said to Jairus, “Don’t be afraid; just believe, and she will be healed.”
51 When he arrived at the house of Jairus, he did not let anyone go in with him except Peter, John and James, and the child’s father and mother. 52 Meanwhile, all the people were wailing and mourning for her. “Stop wailing,” Jesus said. “She is not dead but asleep.”
Exactly! I haven't slept for nine hours yet! I'm going through growth spurt, let me sleep so I can grow taller. What're you doing to wake me up?
53 They laughed at him, knowing that she was dead. 54 But he took her by the hand and said, “My child, get up!”
I don't want to go to school.......
55 Her spirit returned, and at once she stood up. Then Jesus told them to give her something to eat.
That will work. I like food. What's for breakfast?
56 Her parents were astonished, but he ordered them not to tell anyone what had happened.
Well you can be astonished as much as you want! But you still have to cook me breakfast, slaves! I'm hungry.
Then Jesus said,'You're grounded girl, go back to your room, no breakfast until you know how to treat your parents better!'
But I was just dead.....my mind was just not working right!......And I need lots of energy to go from death to life you know.....now I don't have the fuel......I need food!
Well the energy from death to life was from me and my Father.....you didn't even give thanks to me nor my Father......no excuse........go to your room! And I thought you said you were just sleeping.
But.....but you said I was asleep, I could hear that....loud and clear.......
No you didn't hear that....You're spoiled girl, you even lied to us! You were not eternally dead......and you'll have eternal life if you follow me......
But.....
No but! Go to your room!
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